I recently decided that I will be going off the grid in the dating app world. It's time for a little time out. Momma is exhausted. Now don't get me wrong, I support. I should be the spokesperson for these apps. In fact, I have forced multiple friends to go on them and they have found husbands. (W_T_F)
There are a few reasons why I came to this decision. What I found interesting was that the same reasons why I loved the apps ended up causing me to question why I'm on them.
PROS
Build a Man: The world is your oyster. You can choose; hair color, eye color, facial hair (ALWAYS swipe right to beards), height (NO ONE below 6ft), style (this can be influenced/changed) and occupation (no gold diggers).
Multiple Dates: You can swipe while watching Sunday morning and have a date by 60 minutes. I honestly can't remember my dating life before the apps, but I know I didn't have that good of a batting record. My new years resolution last year was to go on a date a week. I lasted till April. It was exhausting. There was one point when I was swiping so much that my thumb started to hurt. TRUE STORY. High point in life.
Pick and Choose: With multiple chats going at once, you can not like the smallest thing about someone and know that there is another cutie wanting to go out with you. (ego boost? YES borderline addictive? YES) If you ever want a little pick me up, just swipe right.
CONS
Build a Man: No-one is perfect. Even though esthetically he can be pleasing, he will most likely be a wet blanket. Isn't that just life? It brings out the superficialness in all of us. One of my friend's husbands once asked me after my last breakup..."Maybe you should try going out with someone that isn't as good looking as you tend to date?". What if he's right? What if I place too much value on looks and miss what's important.
Multiple Dates: I always have had fun dating...especially in NYC. What was a real wake up call for me last year was that I was struggling at work and was craving that partnership of talking about my day with someone. I realized the hard way that I could text about 5 guys and get attention, but not one single guy was that invested in me to ask about my day. (violin playing) Easy way to get attention, but not what we are all really looking for.
Pick and Choose: With the ease of one swipe, you are never really able to focus on one person. 9 times out of 10 first impressions tend to be wrong. What if you only gave a guy one date? I, unfortunately, have done that. What if I missed my husband because I was too interested in the next swipe?
Now I'm not saying I'm giving up on them forever. Let's make that clear. I just need to regroup and kick it old school. I'm in a new place, so I have many people left to meet. Going to get a dog because that's what Oregonians do and they are an added bonus. It's like carrying around a baby as a man. Insta guy magnet...the dog, not the baby...let's not get those confused. Not pulling the goalie yet. I'm looking at it like a science project. Let's see if I can meet people the old fashion way...by actually getting to know the person first rather than their looks.
Wish me luck!